The Farewell 2019

Wala pa sa fifteen minutes naluluha na agad ako. Lolas are so warm and lovely, and I can already feel that this film will hit me really hard. The save face culture of Chinese families shows immediately. Yung dinner table conversation about the wedding and not wanting to look cheap says a lot. It is all about appearance, she said. And that mindset sits at the center of their decisions. The production design feels natural. Exactly how I imagine a real Chinese home would look like. As I got to one third of the film, it also feels like the typical lola moments: do this, do that, don't do this, don't do that. But I really feel lolas are like that because they genuinely care for their family and just want what is best. It comes from love, even if it feels controlling. Another cultural layer is the way they casually talk about money, legacy, and responsibility during family dinners. For some people it might feel like pressure, but honestly if that was instilled in me when I was a child, I think I would have been a better entrepreneur. The biggest shock for me is the culture of not telling someone they have cancer in China. It feels so strange but also extremely cultural. They carry the burden for the person instead of letting the person carry it. The grave offering scene looks ridiculous on the surface, but Filipinos do it too, so it is still relatable. The moment where her grandma gave her money really got me in tears. I remembered Mama Mila giving me money even when I already had my first job. I think the film is a study of morality and how families handle lies. Whether they want to protect the feelings of the person they love, or they take on the emotional burden because it is their culture, norm, or tradition. It is complicated, but the film shows how love makes people justify the choices they make.